That's what She Said: Dawn's Best of 2013
- Dawn Dumont | January 29, 2014
I'm sure youre already sick of BEST OF lists but I don't care because I like lists and besides, mine is short. Here are the stories that I found the most important and provocative of 2013.
Rob Ford Category: Absurd, Annoying, Disgusting
Throughout the year, the erstwhile mayor of the beleaguered city of Toronto beckoned comedians to make jokes at his expense. He is the comedian gift that keeps giving from denying that he was addicted to crack to admitting that he did indeed smoke crack but wait for it - in a "drunken stupor." Let the absurdity of a "drunken stupor" being a get out of jail free card sink in ("Your Honour, I was driving drunk but I was under the influence of a drunken stupor!")
Later when accused of sexually harassing a co-worker, Ford denied the allegation. Instead of leaving it at that, he added that he was too busy committing a certain sexual act on his wife to harass another woman. The next day, his wife appeared with him for a media event looking very much like a person who never receives that particular sexual act. I call bullshit.
People got mad when the media continued to talk about Ford: "Stop making fun of him. Stop giving him attention and he'll go away!" Uh, no he won't. Like your cousin who posts angry statuses about their ex on facebook, they've become addicted to the attention and won't stop until someone jails them or the Internet breaks.
It's important to talk about Little Boy Lewd because it shows us holes in our systems. Toronto reduced his powers but thats hardly the same as kicking him out on his prodigious butt. Ford is also a reminder that it's important to vote for people who are informed about issues, articulate and, preferably, not crack smokers. Do not vote for the person you would like to have a beer with (or smoke a spliff with, do a line with, etc.), vote for the person who skips beers to stay late at the office. When it comes to leaders, boring > fun.
By the way, expect to see Ford on this list next year, because he is running again.
Naheed Nenshi - Category: Awesome
Nenshi is proof that mayors don't have to suck. During the flooding of the Bow River, the Calgary mayor went without sleep to look after his city. He visited flooded homes, went to emergency shelters, addressed the media and tweeted updates that were informative and witty. He is to Rob Ford as cheesecake is to rancid butter.
The Saskatchewan Party Ads Category: Stupid, Racist
This party ran ads attacking the NDP accusing them of being willing to work with First Nations on resource sharing. Let's get this straight a party was attacked because they were respecting First Nation treaty rights and the rule of law. Is the Saskatchewan Party oblivious to the duty to consult? Or was the temptation to win points via race-baiting too great? Or, are they operating under the doctrine of terra nullius? If so, will Premier Brad Wall be bringing back other medieval laws such as prima nocta? If so, expect some fists to the face. Not only from offended First Nation husbands but from annoyed First Nation women.
IdleNoMore - Category: Inspiring
The Harper government introduced the Omnibus Bill C-45 and four women from Saskatchewan started IdleNoMore. There are many reasons this movement is the most awesome thing to come along since Netflix but here are a few of mine:
It was started by women. Women are still underrepresented in all levels and types of government. IdleNoMore showed the world that female voices are as powerful as they are necessary.
It is unique. The movement expressed itself in round dances, flash mobs and teach-ins. It was organized via the Internet which as any Facebook or Twitter account holder knows is well-populated with Native peeps.
And finally, it unites Indigenous and environmental activists. I find it interesting when politicians say things like, "this law should please the environmentalists..." as if they were a special interest group. From my tiny understanding of science, everyone is a de facto environmentalist unless you're a cyborg that can breathe pollution, eat garbage and bathe in tailings ponds.
Male Hipster Beards - Category: Why?
Men, I like your faces and I want to see them naked and vulnerable as a young male dancer at a rez bachelorette party. Beards don't make you look complicated or manly, they make you look like an unemployed, cheeto-eating stoner who spends all his time in a man-cave that smells like fart. That may be who you actually are but dammit, I don't need to know that straight out of the gate. In 2014, let me have my delusions.